Teenage Dirtbags
by Kootie Bomb
Summary: Once the gunshots rang out and she had to dive behind a cart of cabbages just to stay alive, Sakura knew this wasn't just another high school love story. AU, with the included knives, guns, fist-fights, and all that cool stuff. R&R?
1. Prolouge: the day it all began

Chapter One.  
**.the day it all started.**

The clock's ticks seemed to grow louder with every twitch of the hand, echoing in Uchiha Sasuke's ears - thoroughly driving him completely and utterly insane. He stared at the infernal device that hung on the wall across the science lab.

_'Hurry up,' _Sasuke thought impatiently, drumming his fingers noisily against the tabletop. Lab is typically a class where you do nothing, as the teacher is very lax about schoolwork. While his other junior classmates were laughing and talking with each other, he sat behind the lab counter, sending death glares at the clock. Next period is their lunch break - just another room filled with immature, stupid teenagers...including dumb, bullying jocks and flocking, slutty fangirls.

But he gets to see _her _there.

Haruno Sakura.

The rosette had been the object of affection for Sasuke for quite a while now. Ever since he noticed how...well, _pretty_ she's been. Of course, he never has, or probably ever will, voiced his opinion on the - for lack of better wording - _nerd_. Even though Sasuke is one to absolutely not care what others thought of him, it would just be so...so awkward to just walk up to her and work what others (and secretly, himself) called the 'Uchiha charm'.

The second Sasuke takes his eyes off of the clock in defeat, the bell rings ear-piercingly loud. "Finally," Sasuke mumbles to himself, collecting his papers and backpack, practically running out of the lab (knocking a person or two over in the process), keeping his head low as he usually does.

Winding his way through the throng of high school students, he searched for his locker to put his books away. Just another day in the life of Sasuke. A depressing one, filled with loneliness and angst.

"Ooooh, _Sasuke-kuuun_!"

Okay, scratch the 'loneliness' part. Angst can remain, but loneliness is quite a lie. An arm was flung around his shoulders, with light blonde hair whipping at his face.

Yamanaka Ino - Konohagakure High School's resident fashionista, as well as backstreet stoner (the latter less known to most). A friend of Sasuke's. The want of many, _many_ boys in KGHS. A deliciously curvy girl with long, perfectly taken care of platinum blonde hair - and extremely proud. Today, she wore a solid purple tanktop with a low cut - _'Probably ridiculously expensive, even for such a simple item'_, Sasuke thought with a frown - and gray sweatpants that were pulled up to her knees. Sweatpants, made fashionable only by Yamanaka Ino. A pair of clean purple converse adorned her feet. Ino's skin was in it's usual prime condition, without a single blemish. Make-up applied perfectly. She used to be one of Sasuke's fangirls, but had a "change of heart", apparently.

The perfect girl, if she wasn't so _loud_. Falling into step with them were her two best friends - Aikimichi Chouji and Nara Shikamaru.

The peppy blonde girl giggled, "Off to find Sakura, eh, Sasuke?" His friends often teased him about his soft spot for the pink-haired bookworm. She was part of their junior classmen that actually _didn't_ get involved with the bad side of Konoha. A mistake too many people made. Ino, got involved with the drug scene in freshman year. Sasuke, a boy with a violent and bloody past that got him into too many fights.

"Of course he is, Ino," Chouji munched on his chips, sniggering, "He loves her more than Shika loves blondes."

Akimichi Chouji - a chubby boy from a decent family. Kind-hearted, loyal to the ones he respects, does quite well in school. But...why friends with people like Uchiha Sasuke? Well, Chouji's childhood was not a happy one. Of course, not as bloody as Sasuke's, but traumatizing enough to leave long-lasting results. Constantly bullied and beaten for being the odd-one-out, the fatass, the slow one, Chouji adorned scars on both his heart and skin from the ones who had made fun of him. And finally, one day of freshman year, he snapped. Beaten the jocks who had usually made fun of him. He had finally had enough. Now, some of the jocks in KGHS now adorn scars of their own from Chouji himself. Now, Chouji is as sweet as ever, always found with a bag of chips and baggy clothes - a smile often enough on his face. But people have learned one thing for certain - don't mess with Akimichi Chouji.

Shikamaru glanced at his best friend with a laugh, and nudging Ino in her hip, who, in turn, gave him a sharp slap in the stomach. Yet, he still smirked.

Nara Shikamaru - a...well, a very lazy teenager. He never attends any of his classes, and the ones he does go to, he either falls dead asleep, or stares at the clouds from the window throughout the entire period. He may seem stupid and underachieving, but he is quite the genius. Whenever standard tests were given, he completely aced every single one of them. He's rumored to have an IQ over 200. An expert at games such as Shogi and Go that require much strategic talent. In Chouji's 'Fight for the Chubbies' (as many enjoyed calling it), he helped his best friend and ended up knifing Chouji's main tormentor. No vital organs were touched, and the jock survived (only spending one night in the hospital, actually) - but Shikamaru's had a bad - correction, _even worse_ - reputation ever since. Oh, and he has a thing for blondes, as Chouji just stated.

"Shut up," Sasuke grunted, frowning deeply, "You're all ridiculous." Ino rolled her eyes, grinning a shiny-white smile,

"Ah, Sasu-cakes, you know we're just kiddin' around. Even though I hate Sakura's _guts_, you two would just be the cutest thing!"

"_'-you two would just be the cutest thing!'_", Shikamaru mimicked in a dramatically high-pitched voice, earning a laugh from Chouji and a yell from Ino. Sasuke rolled his eyes and reached his locker, turning the lock, banging once on the bottom right corner, which popped the door open. It always seemed like he got the broken locker, every single year of his school life.

"Hey, Uchiha!"

Sasuke turned his head, expression remaining hollow, to see Principal Tsunade stomping towards him, a bottle of sake tucked rather indiscreetly in her jacket's pockets. She snapped at him, "You missed detention three damn days in a row, that's another hour after school!"

"Hai, Tsunade-_sama_," Sasuke droned, putting emphasis on the honorific in a mocking sense. Tsunade's dirty mouth and loud voice were an obviously unorthodox teaching method, but if a student takes a step out of line, she punishes them severely. Sasuke, however, has grown an immunity to her angry words and sharp insults.

"You miss this one, and that's expulsion," Tsunade finished, and stomped off down the hall to find more kids to yell at. _'Somebody's not in a good mood'_, Sasuke sighed inwardly, dropping his books and stuffing his bag into his locker and slamming it shut before everything could pop back out at him.

The raven-haired teenager began the short trek to the cafeteria, Ino and Shikamaru arguing somewhere behind him (Chouji laughing at his two friends, of course). _'I wonder if I can get out of detention. Maybe I could just fake an illness...'_ So lost in thought, Sasuke didn't see anyone in front of him (usually, people just step out of his way) - leading him to running head on with somebody, knocking him back and knocking the other one completely off balance onto the floor.

"Ow! Damnit, Uchiha, watch where you're going!"

Haruno Sakura. Such a lovely, beautiful face with gorgeous hair and amazing green eyes. Sasuke had to hold back a lovestruck sigh, as well as a blush. She collected an old-looking library book and the red ribbon that had come out of her hair in the collision, quickly tying her bangs back again and giving him a sharp glare before stomping off.

_'Yup, what a girl.' _Sasuke thought, _'Too bad she hates my intestines and wants to rip my head off.'_

"Jeez, Sasuke, way to block traffic!" Ino howled, shoving at him. The young Uchiha sighed before regaining his steps to the cafeteria.

* * *

**And that's the beginning of my SasukexSakura fanfiction. **

**I know the high school AU may seem cliche, but I hope mine is different. Warning, there will be blood, drug references, as well as knives and fist-fighting. Maybe a suggestive scene or two. All that cool stuff, y'know? So, sit tight. I'll be updatin' ;)**

**love,  
KB **


	2. One: where the shit starts happening

Chapter One (legit).  
**.where the shit starts happening.**

Konohagakure High School's cafeteria is a truly deadly place. The voices of the students put together in one room become deafening, food (and sometimes even the utensils) are flung from one side of the room to the other, and the supposed "cheesecake"? Poisoned for sure. Which is why Sasuke brings a bagged lunch.

Chouji in the lead, Sasuke, Shikamaru, and Ino made their way to their usual lunch table, all the way in the shadowed back. Probably the best place to eat lunch, since little food makes it way over their via food fight, and on Konoha's hot days, it comfortably shaded by the large cherry blossom tree trunk just outside the window next to the table. Another three friends were already there - Inuzuka Kiba, Hyuuga Neji, and Tenten.

Ino and Tenten are basically the only girls within their little rebellious group. They sit at the far end next to the window ("It's so pretty, watching the cherry blossoms fall!" claims Ino), and a perfect, secluded place for a heated gossip session. Chouji is next to Tenten and across from Shikamaru - the middle of the table, good for the feast that Chouji brings to school every day. Sasuke and Neji are next to those two, where schoolwork and homework is usually done/given help with, so it's usually stacked with schoolbooks and papers (since Sasuke and Neji are probably the smartest kid in their whole year). And, at the far end, is where Kiba and Aburame Shino usually sit - the unlucky ones who usually end up with bits of celery in their hair by the end of lunch. Kiba doesn't mind, though.

"Hey, where's Shino?" Ino piped up as she swooped down across from Tenten.

"Nurse's office," Kiba said simply, while inspecting the hamburger-like substance on the plastic red tray.

Inuzuka Kiba, one of KGHS's legitimate bad boys. Wild, rowdy, a terribly violent temper. Dashing good looks, though. Sharp-toothed, wild-haired; no wonder he's commonly nicknamed as Dog Boy ("Wow, sooo original," he comments with a roll of the eyes). He's a druggie, and quite the good boxer. Even though he's involved in all of this bad shit, he still is a very decent, friendly guy and doesn't pick fights with random people off the streets like _some _people (*coughUzumakiNarutocough*). But, when you do happen to mess with his friends, you usually end up in the ER, because Kiba is the farthest thing from gentle and never does he hesitate to go in for the kill. Very loyal. Just like a dog. ("Oh, haha," he remarks).

"Did you see Sakura's hair today?" Ino struck up conversation with Tenten, "She had that ribbon in that pink monstrosity. _My _ribbon." Ino took out the low-calorie foods she packs every day as she sneered, "I _burned_ all the stuff she gave _me_."

"Yeah." Tenten nodded, just going along with it, "I'd probably do the same."

"Nah," Shikamaru said, "Burning isn't Tenten's style. She'd knife it into a thousand little pieces." Then the ponytail-ed boy looked down at his lunch, his expression turning rather downcast, "In all of my sixteen years, my mother still hasn't learned that I hate boiled eggs. Hey, Chouj', can I get a bite of that - "

"No." Chouji said between bites.

"Aw, c'mon, buddy, I'm your best fri - "

"No." Sighing, Shikamaru wiped at the food bits sprayed at his face by a furiously eating Akimichi.

Ino snickered, before offering a handful of small foods to Shikamaru, "Cherry tomato?"

Shikamaru nodded, taking the small red fruit. But before he could eat the cherry tomato, their was a loud "SPLAT" from next to him...and the whole cafeteria fell into a deep, dead silence. A deep, dead silence - except for two noises.

The unidentified edible object sliding off of Sasuke's face.

And Uzumaki Naruto's laugh.

"OOOH, SASUKE-TEME! I GOT YOU RIGHT IN THE FACE, _DATTEBAYO_! HAHAHAHAAAAA!"

As the blonde idiot continued to laugh obnoxiously loud, Sasuke's expression darkened as his teeth clenched. Naruto - the absolute number one _hate _of his life. So what if they used to be "best friends" in middle school? All Sasuke wanted to do now is stuff chicken bones down the Uzumaki's tiny little _throat_.

So, he proceeded to do so.

Leaping out of his bench, he grabbed a handful of chicken wings from Chouji's meal and darted across the cafeteria at the oblivious, laughing Naruto and tackled him from the table he stood on. Soon, the whole cafeteria erupted into cheers and shouts, egging both Uzumaki and Uchiha alike to fight. But suddenly, another louder shout was heard - a shout loud enough to frighten a bear off, a shout loud enough to deafen a whole cafeteria. Everyone froze. Even Naruto and Sasuke.

Chouji was on his feet, eyes ablaze with anger. He had his finger pointed cursedly at Sasuke, "NOBODY. TOUCHES. MY. _FOOD_!" The chubby boy picked up a handful of mashed potatoes and nailed Sasuke right in the face. Sasuke's teeth grit, and the normally level-headed, rather quiet boy let out an enraged scream (Inner Sasuke: "My hair is getting messed up, goddamnit!") and grabbed a styrofoam bowl full of chocolate pudding, chucking it at Chouji.

But Chouji then ducked, and the pudding hit a certain Ino Yamanaka. Sasuke, inwardly, panicked, _'I'm doomed,'_. Ino let out a truly ear-splitting shriek of complete and utter anger as the pudding tangled itself into messy globs in her hair, and stained her tank-top and course, Ino - being herself - always has a change of emergency clothes in her locker, but still. Don't mess with the clothes, man. "UCHIHA! YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT!" She picked up Tenten's plate of homemade steamed dumplings, throwing them at Sasuke - instead hitting an innocent, unexpecting Aburame Shino who had came back from the nurse's office.

And when you hit Shino with food, it's all hell.

In less than three minutes, the entire cafeteria and it's population were _covered _in food. Students stop atop tables, using trays as shields and plastic bowls as helmets, and their free hand was used for flinging food at the most unsuspecting. Tenten even threw a fork or two (all plastic, thankfully). From under a table, a food-covered Naruto crouched over a plastic plate, mixing different foods into one, "Oooh, Sasuke-baka's gonna love this-"

But before poor Naruto could even add his "-dattebayo" to the sentance, familiar blue and black Vans appeared before him, legs covered in food-stained black skinny jeans. Uchiha Sasuke bent down, glaring daggers at Naruto, "Dobe."

"Teme," Naruto sneered back.

"Dobe,"

"Teme,"

"Dobe,"

"Teme,"

"Dobe." Sasuke snarled, finishing the argument and spraying two-month expired grape juice in Naruto's eyes, who promptly fell back, clawing at his skin, "MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL FACEEEE! SASUKE-TEME, HOW COULD YOUUUU!"

"Drama queen," Sasuke quipped with a roll of the eyes, before standing up - just in time to dodge a plate full of natto. He shuddered. Sasuke _hated _natto. All too sweet, in his opinion. In fact, he hates sweet foods.

"JUST WHAT IS GOING _ON_ IN HERE!" came a shrill, loud shriek from the doorway. Once more, everyone froze, turning slowly to see Vice Principal/Secretary Shizune at the door, eyes bulging in terror, jaw dropped open. Sasuke let out a low breath of relief. If it had bee Tsunade, they would be in hell right about now.

Shizune glared around. She was no Tsunade, but she could be scary when she wanted to be. "Who started this?"

Suddenly, the whole junior year had their fingers pointed at Uchiha Sasuke and Uzumaki Naruto. Naruto's face pulled into an angry, yet panicked, expression as he pointed at a certain, food-covered, drink-drenched, pink-haired girl, "Sakura-chan made me do it!"

"I-I did not! No way!" Sakura squeaked, waving her hands with a nervous smile on her face.

"Sakura-chan, you stink at lying, dattebayo..."

"Shut _UP_, Naruto!"

"UZUMAKI NARUTO, UCHIHA SASUKE, HARUNO SAKURA! REPORT HERE AFTER SCHOOL TO CLEAN THIS MESS UP!" Shizune shrieked angrily, before leaving the cafeteria with a slam of the doors, her pet pig Tonton trotting after her.

With a sighlooked over to the apple of his eye - fyi, that's Sakura - and grimanced. She was shaking with anger. Spinning around, she sent equally deadly glares at both Naruto and Sasuke, "YOU ARE BOTH _SO _DEAD! I'VE NEVER GOT A DETENTION IN MY LIFE! GODDAMNIT, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

Not wanting to hear one of Haruno Sakura's rants (something she's famous for), Sasuke looked away with his practiced impassive expression. But yet, his thoughts were these:

_'She likes me.'_

...Sasuke, you dumbass.

* * *

**Heh. Sasuke&Naruto are sooo dead. **


End file.
